Republicans

Expert ventriloquist Dick Cheney (pictured left) smirks at the audience,
while deftly controlling his President dummy.

Salutations oh friends of mine,

While it is true that people of other nations periodically get to share in the normally a uniquely American experience, I would be remiss in leaving the sensation of fearing Republicans off of this site. It takes more than half the the voting electorate to cast enough Republican backed ballots to create a Republican politician. This seems to be possible (and has taken place often) in a country where at least a third of the population genuinely fear them.

You might ask, "How can anyone fear a person with a red tie who wants to lower my taxes?"

It's a fair question and you would have to follow American politics to understand the answer. To an outsider, American politics make less sense than American 'football'. There is a lot of starting and stopping and cuddling that seems to make no sense, so let me explain using simple generalizations. To begin, you should watch an episode of this slice of silver age Americana called "Leave it to Beaver": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GqMQDb9aG4A (sorry I can't embed this particular video). Republicans depict this oversimplified way of life as the ideal in 'American Family Values'.

To the non-Republican, it is possible to hold dear to things that would certainly not fit in the household activities of Wally and 'The Beav'. Topics which are dear to some Americans including rock and roll, immigration, pornography, peace with other nations, health care, free speech, abortion, foreign affairs, science, drugs, homosexuality, non-Protestant religions, etc., none of which would not fit well in a "Leave it to Beaver" episode. To those who fear Republicans, it is assumed (often correctly) that all these things are despised and shunned by Republicans.

The fear, is that many Americans believe that Republicans will go so far as to wage war over any one of these topics in an attempt to obliterate them from American life. Republicans, they feel, will stop at nothing to destroy their way of lives and will turn their own fears against them to exploit the voting public to keep themselves in office.

Oh my friends, it is a web of fear they weave, these Americans. Each one adds fear to the fears of the last, like a snowball at the tip of a mountain becomes an avalanche by the time it reaches the bottom. Take heed and learn from their mistakes my friends, lest ye become fearful yourselves.

Your humble and all too public servant,
Sir Robyn

References:

• Every political publication in the United States ever.